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Usually drunken.

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posts taste like internet

Aug 19, 2008, 10:19 pm by Lew

I try to enjoy the fine things in life, rather I try to enjoy things finely. Not necessarily the expensive or the rare, just the fine. I just try to enjoy things for what they are. To enjoy the essence, the spirit of a thing. Anything one does for pleasure has a spirit, the thing that is motivating you to partake. I am making a concerted effort to enjoy things purely with an undiluted spirit. With a build up like this you are surely wondering what I am getting at. Liquor and coffee, that is the subject of my musings. Liquor should taste like liquor. Not like a slurpy with booze. A cocktail is liquor with flavors, usually served very cold. The alcohol brings its own flavor and heightens the taste of the ingredients. A cocktail is an experience, a powerful and unique culinary experience. Yes culinary. Cocktails are a great way to experience flavors because many aromatics are soluble in alcohol. It wasn't until I had homemade cocktails that I experienced what a drink can be. A margarita at a tex-mex place is tasty and happiness inducing, but an experience it is not. When I had this revelation admit I started kind of looking down my nose at people who couldn't handle a real drink (by my definition). Then I realized what a hypocrite I am. I drink coffee all day, but with more milk and sugar than a snickers bar. Coffee should taste like coffee, not like candy. I learned to drink coffee at starbucks, where they make coffee flavored milk shakes. Coffee is great for getting you wired, but it is also a flavor experience to savor. I am trying to cut out the sugar and use just a touch of milk. I am enjoying it, my coffee tastes like coffee! Imagine that!

Mark’s Wedding

Aug 11, 2008, 11:20 am by Paul Stiverson

This past weekend I travelled to Dallas for Mark’s (a fellow contributor to this bloog) wedding, and boy howdy, it was a blast.

The Rehearsal Dinner

Everybody meets up at the church and we proceed to have a pretty elaborate rehearsal for the wedding… rather than just remember where we were supposed to stand we put pins in the carpet to mark our locations. The planner did a really great job at being prepared, but sometimes it is best to just step back and let the magic happen. On an interesting side-note, I got matched up with the best looking bridesmaid. One thing that struck me as kinda odd was that the bride didn’t participate in the rehearsal at all, she was there, but she just sat there in the pew. Apparently the planner wanted her to shoot from the hip on the big day. Anyway, after the rehearsal we all went to dinner at a ridiculous restaurant in Dallas (I can’t remember the name, Mark?). We get there and the first thing they do is start pouring us some pretty damn tasty wine, so far so good. The food they delivered was abso-fucking-lutely amazing, but unfortunately I was seated across the table from one of the less good looking bridesmaids (thanks Mark). Then came the gift giving part. Mark had everybody in the room leaking like a sieve with his emotionally charged descriptions of his relationship with everybody in the room (thanks Mark).

Post Rehearsal Dinner Drunkfest

After the rehearsal dinner we all retired to the hotel (which Mark’s parents were gracious enough to provide for us) and promptly got fucked up and retold some old corps stories. The fellow with whom I was sharing a room ended up getting a little too drunk though, and the night ended with him wandering around the room naked looking for his cellphone/underwear (well it really ended with me leaving the room after he started vomiting, but that isn’t as funny as the drunken nakedness).

Pre-Wedding Shenanigans

About an hour and fifteen minutes before we were supposed to be at the church (for preparations and pictures and shit) we decided to make a trip down to the amusement center which was conveniently located directly adjacent to the hotel to ride some go-carts. I have to admit that I wasn’t too keen on the plan, but I went so as not to be a wet-blanket. This was the right decision, I can’t remember the last time I had that much fun. Needless to say we were all about 15 minutes late to the church, and the groom was about 30 minutes late; no biggie.

Wedding Boringness

Once we are all there and dressed we commence the waiting around part of the day. We all sat around for at least 30 minutes waiting for the photographer to show up, and after the elderly couple with the camera and weird umbrella thing showed up we all wanted to kill them. They were easily the most irritating people within a two-mile radius.

The wedding went off without a hitch; credit should go to the thorough preparation by the wedding planner I’m sure.

Immediately after the wedding there were more pictures to be taken. If I had a crowbar I would have taken to each of those camera toting dorks with a fury that cannot be adequately described.

Reception

The reception was pretty awesome (I submit that Jim and Jamie’s was still awesomer but that is neither here nor there). At one point the DJ brought the entire wedding party out on the dance floor to do a wedding party dance, this was the definition of a poorly executed great idea. First problem, the dance floor was about two sizes too small for the number of people on it. Second problem, the song that was selected was entirely too fast (3rd gear and seventeen, but Aaron Watson). Third problem, I’m a natural showoff. Those three things equal my dance parter and me in a compromising position on the ground, goddamn I’m a loose cannon sometimes. Oh well, nobody got hurt, but it did so happen that the cameraman got the whole incident on film (thanks Mark, I expect you to edit that out (and put it on youtube or some shit)).

Those who know me best are aware that I love to waltz, this being the case I bugged the crap out of Mark (before the wedding) to make sure that the DJ played some waltzes, and then I bugged the crap out of the DJ to play some waltzes. Unfortunately only one waltz was played, and it was only for the married couples. I asked the DJ to spin another and he said, “Sure thing chief, the next song will be a waltz”. As it happened the next song was “The Chair”, by George Strait; at the time I thought, hmm not a waltz, but a good song never-the-less. I went back and bugged the DJ, “I though you were going to play a waltz”, the person behind the booth replied “‘The Chair’ is a waltz”. I was once again reaching for my crowbar. A lesson for the rest of you: when hiring a DJ bring along a boom-box and ask them to classify a few songs by the type of dance that is to be done to them, if they can’t determine what a waltz is then hire somebody else. This wasn’t a huge deal, but I didn’t get to waltz with Mandy or Mallory.

Post Reception Drunkfest

After the reception we all retired to the hotel once again, and we got drunk(er) once again; but this time we had some intelligence and we went back to the go-carts, it was slightly less fun this time because the place was a bit more crowded, but still pretty damn fun.

Finally a decent seat, oh wait.

Aug 11, 2008, 10:18 am by Paul Stiverson

Preface: I’m writing this from American Airlines flight 1396, nonstop service from SFO to DFW. I’m on my way to Mark’s wedding.

I think I found the best and worst seat on the Macdonald Douglas Super 80, I have all the legroom an adult human could need—a full foot of space between my knees and the wall in front of me. However, to make up for the lack of tray table in front of me they gave us a seat with a build in tray table (think of the desks in a big lecture hall), this means that the width of the seat was reduced slightly, and that the armrests are not movable. This poses a problem for the large framed individual, the Asian fellow next to me doesn't appear to be in duress, but I’m a bit cramped. This seat happens to be located directly behind the flight attendants’ station—toward the rear of the aircraft—and the S80 just so happens to have twin rear mounted engines. Basically this row of seats (and the one directly behind us) is crammed between two massive turbine engines rotating at ungodly speeds; it is quite loud back here. So loud in fact that I have my iPod turned up to nearly full blast, I’m probably above OSHA regulation aural safety levels here, I anticipate that Mark will have to speak up a bit when he picks me up.

I took advantage of the TSA’s relaxation of their liquids policy by bringing on some Whiskey (Gentleman Jack) that I was fortunate to find in quantities of less than 3 ounces (90ml). I had just finished up my second 50ml bottle when the flight attendent told me that I wasn't allowed to consume alcohol that they hadn’t served me. Apparently it’s bar rules up here. Anyway, I appologized, she said it was no problem. Even though I know better know I’m still pulling this every time, it is a pretty good racket. My polite appology also bought us some favor with the nice lady because she brought me a delicious cup of ice cream, I’m not sure if she was just trying to make the other passengers jealous, or if we are like the ghetto first class, but it was pretty nice.

Smidgen

Jul 8, 2008, 10:54 pm by Lew

I am a smidgen drunk. i am going to take advantage of that to give you my thoughts for the day. 1) sleeping is nice, i want a job where i sleep until 11. then go to work if i want to. i want the same money i make now for that. i mean i could do a weeks worth of work in one day if they didn't care about face time at the lab. can i just work 2 days solid and then have the next 5 to knock around? is this a fair and just world? 2) i was sweeping my kitchen and thinking about capitalism. while doing that i imagined a picture of me sweeping the kitchen with a caption "this is the moment you realized you don't have to be a slave." the thought made me giggle a little. fuck it y'all let's all build greenhouses and grow our own food (and die of gangrene). 3) robots. what the hell. is everything going to be robots? will there be robots to replace all the animals? will there be robot deer with glowing robot eyes? who the hell needs that. we already have deer. we don't need robot deer. fucking shit man. i thought that at lunch today with vince. i didn't say that out loud. i should have.

damn my bunnies are gay for each other.

New Roommate

May 20, 2008, 5:11 am by Paul Stiverson

I met my roommate today, I wasn’t expecting him to get into town until Wednesday, but alas, he showed up today (well, yesterday actually, but since I haven’t slept I still consider now (today) to be part of yesterday). Bob—from Wisconsin—comes in as I was reading, introduces himself as my new roommate and then mentions that this is his third summer in the program and that he was hoping to room with his roommate from last summer. He went to the front desk and requested a different room; he was my roommate for about 15 minutes, no big deal, I like living alone. Anywho, after he got his stuff sufficiently moved into his room he came up and we (Bob, I, and Neuman—Bob’s preferred roommate) went to get some beer. The remainder of the night was spent talking about past summer experiences (boobs), science, boobs, and socialism. The latter topic ended up being the most lengthy bit of discussion by almost an order of magnitude. It was a good night.

Good night.

Delicious Beer

Mar 15, 2008, 12:07 pm by Paul Stiverson

picture of Shiner 99Some friends and I drove down to Shiner, Texas yesterday to visit the brewery. As usual it was pretty kickass, but there was some unexpected goodness; Shiner released their 99th anniversary brew recently so I was able to get a taste. It is freaking fantastic. I picked myself up a case while I was down in Shiner, and the packaging is nearly as awesome as the beer (image at right, click it for a bigger picture). I really hope they keep this anniversary brew thing going after the centennial.

On a related note I spent most of the day either in a car or drinking. During some of the drinking part there was dominos to be played, and delicious summer sausage to be eaten (that’s what she said). Altogether it was a pretty amazing day.

Old People Parties

Jan 27, 2008, 2:18 am by Paul Stiverson

This evening I went to a Mardi Gras themed party at a professor’s house, and it was pretty freaking sweet. There was nobody throwing up, everybody was at least mildly interesting—some people were downright awesome, there were tasty snacks, and nobody passed out. Basically it was like a college party filled with adults… I could get used to this.

Good Friends Leaving

Dec 16, 2007, 3:57 am by Paul Stiverson

My bartender, Carol, graduated today, and she leaves town on Monday. It’s amazing how quickly you can become attached to somebody; quite a few people have moved out of my life over the years, but this is somehow different. I will miss you, I love you.

I know I’ve told you about this site, I hope you read this, and I hope you use the contact link to stay in touch.

My agent sucks

Aug 18, 2007, 3:18 am by Paul Stiverson

Shakespeare (and Geddy Lee) says:

All the world’s a stage,
And all the men and women merely players:
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts…

He goes on to describe the seven ages (acts), but that is outside the context that is necessary. It seems throughout my entire adolescent/adult life I’ve been stuck in one part. I’ve been playing the lovable friend who—while is important to the plot—is utterly unimportant to the other characters, namely the heroines on the stage.

This post was brewed in the wake of yet another platonic pseudo-date with a spectacular girl that I will never make a move on because I: a) choke on my own fear of rejection; b) have a self-sabotaging lack of spine. The two qualities previously mentioned added to the fact that none of the spectacular girls I’ve tried courting are the least bit interested in me romantically adds up to a recipe for ‘single guy with a boatload of female friends a la mode,’ which, conveniently enough, can be prepared in the microwave. I’m getting another beer, post over.

Ouchy

Aug 5, 2007, 11:17 pm by Paul Stiverson

So I was enjoying some wine (Barking Mad Shiraz) and cheese (Asiago) tonight and I cut the ever-loving hell outta my thumb, but don’t fret, I threw a band-aid on there and finished up the wine and cheese while watching The Breakfast Club on USA. To make a long story short, I really like the way band-aids smell. Cheers.

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